“… But I’m Transcending It.”

An Excerpt from Marginal Eyes, Chapter Eight

“Stand against the trunk of the car and spread your legs,” the officer behind me directed. It was all going too far now. Because I had accidentally put the wrong plate on the front of the car?

The officer reached around to my chest, apparently to check my skin-tight sleeveless shirt for weapons.

“Why is your heart beating so fast?” he questioned me sternly.

“Because I’m afraid,” I replied simply. How in the fuck was that not obvious?

My experiences of trauma at being accosted or humiliated by white people had just gone next-level. Meanwhile I had a new home situation unfolding. I was completely oblivious, but Ofelia was quickly growing depressed and resentful. Shortly after that I began to return home to find her lying on the mattress in the bedroom. It didn’t help that I hadn’t even purchased a bed since besides still being in debt we were also in my mind supposed to be living without comfort. My religious fanaticism and social naivete were quickly making it impossible for Ofelia to keep up the appearance that she was okay with our platonic arrangement.

Not only was there no romantic involvement between us, but there were no creature comforts. Deep inside, beyond the fear of financial and domestic instability that drove so many of her choices, Ofelia wanted a regular relationship, and I couldn’t see it. What’s worse, I wouldn’t have wanted it anyway.

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